Week 1: What Happened In The Rest of America?

When you’re a fan of a school in the SEC, you don’t really get much time to read up about what happened in the other minor league conferences around the country.  I’ve taken the liberty of finding a couple of the major headlines from those games and bringing you the abridged version, just so you can devote even more time to keeping up with the SEC.

BRIAN KELLY LOSES GAME, MIND ON NATIONAL TELEVISION

Whoa...easy Killer.

Notre Dame head coach Brian Kelly made one thing known during his team’s 23-20 loss to South Florida on Saturday–he is willing to embarrass himself and any one of his players on national television if they screw up.  Kelly repeatedly showed his displeasure in his team’s “lack of execution”, but what he failed to mention is the fact that South Florida simply fielded a more athletic team than the Irish.  His on-field antics also earned him a few quotes from well-known Irish supporters in the media over the past couple of days–many calling for him to be fired.

Kelly will lead the Irish into Ann Arbor this weekend in primetime on ABC.

Another unhappy party in this situation is ESPN.  College Gameday is slated to be in Ann Arbor, Michigan this weekend for the annual clash between the Wolverines and Irish.  With the Irish’s loss, and subsequent banishment from the polls, the match-up has seemed to have lost what little luster it had to begin with.  I realize that if you’re ESPN, you have to have a few Gameday’s up north every season to try to keep football relevant up there, but let’s be honest–nobody outside of these two fan bases and the people who bet on this game really care about it at all.

ROOKIE COACH AT WEST VIRGINIA DOESN’T OWN SHAMPOO

"The Dana"

If you tuned in to the Marshall/West Virginia game on Sunday afternoon, you probably noticed the one glaring thing that I just couldn’t take my mind off of for the entire game (even during the weather delays)–Dana Holgorsen’s extraordinarily nasty hair.  While the Mountaineers play on offense was very consistent behind Geno Smith’s arm in a 34-13 weather-shortened victory, Hologerson looked on while continuing to attempt to fix his “doo”.  Most of the time this consisted of combing his hair using his fingers, but ultimately resulted in him pushing his hand in an upward motion, causing the back of his hair to stray in many different directions.

How is it possiple NOT to laugh at this guy?

I’ve heard of people having “bad hair days” before, but this is just uncalled for.  I know West Virginia AD Oliver Luck is too busy watching his son play on the other side of the country to have time to worry about this, but somebody from the PR Department, or ANYBODY for that matter, has to get this guy to put on a hat, toboggan, doo rag, ANYTHING.  Most coaches take pride in their appearance on the sideline, but this guy apparently refuses to even bathe before a game.  Stay tuned to the Dweller to find out if this situation is addressed in Week 2.

-Chris

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2 responses to “Week 1: What Happened In The Rest of America?

  1. I am a WVU fan and this is on point and hilarious

    keep it up

  2. Officially the worst hair in college football. I don’t care how long you let it grow out in the back Dana…we all know what’s going on up top. Let it go man…just shave it off.

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